dark air
gray air
black air
steam
redness on the floor

all is gone

only a strike of luck
between me
and killer blood

i burned it softly
smoked it
smoked the pile of ashes as well

then
i turned into nothing

only an empty mountain is left..

Hoy, hasta la sangre pesa.
Tu nombre ahoga,
Me aprieta el cuello hasta cortar la respiracion.
Todo es gris y rojo,
Y azul, y negro.

Y con forme pasa el tiempo,
Mas te quiero lejos.
Mas te quiero fuera.
Que nunca te haya conocido,
Por que te amo con dolor,
Y te odio con el corazon.

Me cuesta tanto decirlo,
Pero te quiero con coraje,
Con la rabia de mil mares.
Te odio cuando vienes,
Te odio mas cuando vas.
Y no te quiero cerca,
Pero no te soporto lejos.

Me has jodido la existencia.

I'm a lost soul,
With few sprinkles of hope
That keep me alive.
That whispers to me at night
'All is not lost'
And perhaps there is redemption,
And perhaps even salvation,
For our mothers,
for our brothers.
Perhaps we are all sparks,
Separated by time and space,
Distanced by the means of those that seek to consume us,
To extinguish our light,
To numb our thoughts.
They have convinced us that we are alone,
In this cold damp Hell,
And that no one shares our thoughts.
Crazy, they say.
But insanity resonates more truthfully.
Perhaps I am insane.
For the simple fact that I desire a change
In the mode of thought.
Perhaps because I desire to escape
The foundation that has been laid out before me,
And create my own world
Without the flaws of the past,
To put in the flaws of the current age,
So that I might at least understand them,
To correct the mistakes that I've recognize as mistakes
So as to improve my condition
And the conditions of other sparks,
Perhaps because I want something more,
I'm insane, perhaps,
Because I'm not seeking an Eutopia,
Because I'm not aiming for perfection.
Because what I want is a life on my own terms.
A world that belongs to me.
Because I want to feel at home with the world,
rather than a long-term visitor.

I found you last night.
In the lameness you wisp, wisp, whisper.
You move through me, around me
leaving remnants of your name.

'Stare', you said, say, do
but you don’t don’t you.
Aches driving you ached
and ache me. Take me.

Grazing my shadow,
paying my karmic dues
you’ll cease not
shifting, suggesting.

Sliding through my doors,
my air, my hair
I’ll put you back,
bewitched, unlit.

The days erase themselves,
And the minutes are misspellings.
And the clock towers are peaks of minutes,
Dripping like honey trees.
I got bees on my tongue.
Already written upon my skin over and over again.
And the days,
And the days,
The days erase themselves,
And the minutes are misspellings.
And the clock towers are peaks of minutes,
Dripping like honey trees.
I got bees on my tongue.
Already written upon my skin over and over again.

I missed that boy today,
He simply wasn't there.
Thanks to a life of acting,
I pretended not to care.

Because I always find a way to make them leave...

Now.
We're sitting on a fancied plateau.
Were not on the edge.
But we're getting closer.
Inching closer.
The horizon seems too big to be real.
But, of course, it is.
Why wouldn't it be?
It's so grand.
It's what we want it to be.
Unreachable.
Unattainable.
Unchangeable.
We can change the way we perceive it,
but we can't change it.
That's what life is, you know?
A totality of changing perceptions.
To some; growing.
To others; phases.
To me; revealing.

2+5+1+2+5 will always equal beauty.

This soul is burning,
no one gets to see
no one ever gets to come in

you say you feel me
i say you lie

if you're not here,
inside,
beside,
within me,
how could you feel the heat?
the coldness?

no one will ever understand this sickness
its roots have grown way to deep
i feel it everywhere now

in my mind,
in my body,
in my soul

so no matter how much you try
you will never see
you will never understand

ever

You have me enraptured. . .

lovers and strangers
mixed up world

my skin is talking too loud for my heart to listen
i wish you could hear it
but you are sleeping
and the wind is blowing
and tonight i feel lonely
and sometimes you can't find calmness in the stars

i wish you could kiss the end of my lips right now
i wish you could make me feel more like a person
more like a soul
but the clouds are gone
and so is your smell
and no more feeling your arm around my neck

is funny
how my hands keep searching for each other
I think they confuse the other one with one of yours
they want to remain clutch for the rest of the night
and i still don't know why my body is so drawn to you
even my mind keeps staring back at your memory

and i'm not sure if i want to be that word you end up saying
i think i rather be that feeling you end up swallowing
that way i could swim from your throat to your guts and live there
or perhaps i just want you to fill the space between my thighs
im still not sure, don't think ill figure it out tonight

oh god, tonight i only wish i could write lines
that would fall perfectly in place with the other one
but i can't, because none of my thoughts seems to rhyme
they don't even make sense, they have no harmony

But i will keep borrowing thoughts and words from life
to try to explain the things inside
even if they never come out the way i want them to do

i wish my heart had hands, you know
and i wish those hands had pens
and i wish they could write what they feel
in a white sheet of paper
that way the words would come out directly
out of this blood pumping organ
without being contaminated by my thoughts

and i think going from one word to another
this abruptly
and clicking enter before is time
might confuse you
but i cant stop writing
not 'til i tell you i want to feel your hands
around my ribs one more time
and confess that i've always had this hole inside me
that i cant seem to fill it with anything
and that it keeps growing, and growing
and that im lost and that im broken,
and that i've come to think i have no repair....

And even when I close my eyes I can’t sleep,
but why would I want to in the first place?

I crashed into reality,
Or reality crashed into me.
Minds no longer have a mind of its own.
They have been infected with social germs,
With cultural viruses ,
That keep feeding them the wrong ideas.
Ideas with no pride, no self-respect.
That keep crawling in lower class negligence,
That can't decide for themselves,
That can't do anything for themselves,
Other than to defend the emptiness of their existence.
People have stop trying to save themselves,
They seem to be stuck in a phase of numbness.
No more struggling between good and evil.
No more trying to choose a side, a balance.
They have forgotten about the chaos,
About the importance of sense and nonsense.
They no longer remember life,
And the importance of living, of choosing.
They are doing what they are told.
They are going where they are told.
Their choices are not really their choices,
They are THEIR choices.
The higher minds controlling everything from above.
From everywhere, in matter of fact.
Telling you what to do, what to think, what to wear.
How to act, how to talk, what to say.
When to say, when to do it, how to do it.
Men have ceased to be Men,
They are now a product,
Produce in masses for the masses.

estos huesos
te gritan
te imploran
te lloran
te buscan
te buscan y no encuentran nada
solo carne
solo carne que come carne
no hay alma
no hay corazon
no hay sangre
y aun asi mi sangre te llama
te grita
te implora
te llora
te busca
te busca y no encuentra nada
solo un cuerpo frio
un cuerpo frio sobre una cama caliente
se ha perdido el cuerpo caliente
sobre la cama humeda
esa cama testiga de sismos
sismos que hacian que mis labios se entumecieran
que mis manos se apretaran fuerte a tu espalda ancha
marcando mis unas en tu piel blanca
mientras besaba tu cuello
mientras rozaba tus labios con mi lengua
y tu me apretabas
y yo te abrazaba
queria perderme en tu pecho
queria adentrarme a ti
queria fundirme hasta llegar al centro de tu ser
pero eras tu el que ya estaba dentro de mi
entrando y saliendo a tu placer
haciendome querer tenerte cada vez mas dentro en mi